Disclaimer: This is *not* meant to be taken serious 🙂
While the planet’s news organizations have been busy themselves this year with silly stories about things like “politics,” “justice” and “financial wellness,” we realized a major gap in coverage of the things that truly matter…mainly ice cream.
Ice Cream is the sweetest treat of them all, and how that isn’t front page news every single day, we don’t know. What we do know is that it’s high time the ice cream game ups its ante, so that they are forced to bring the oh, so delicious double scoop waffle cone back into the spotlight where it belongs.Fellow ice cream lovers, unite! Here are seven ice cream flavors so deliciously outlandish we think they would make headlines:
1. Doritos Locos Mint Choco Chipos
Taco Bell made a pretty righteous move by introducing the beloved Doritos brand into it’s taco game. How about ice cream does the same deal…but also adds mint chocolate chip to cool down the spice. Wig splitter. Sounds crazy. Crazy…delicious.
2. TinderScoops Ice Cream
Swipe right if it’s delicious. Swipe left it’s not. How about banking on the popularity of this absurdly popular dating app? Let’s face it…all ice cream would probably be bought after midnight if somebody did this, anyway. Maybe not the best idea we’ve had.
3. The Real Housewive’s of Orange Sherbert
Exactly like orange sherbert…except doused with gallons of high proof liquor.
4. Bigfoot & Friends Mermaid, Unicorn, Garden Gnome, Leprechaun, Rainbow Delight
Somehow, every mythological creature ever conceived has been showing up in every book, commercial and kids cartoon for the last few years. Maybe someone can capitalize on all of them. The only question is…does Bigfoot have a discerning sweet tooth? We hope so. Sometimes with ice cream the sillier the better. Sometimes it just takes a horse with a horn or nacho chip to sell it.
We salute all ice cream, the crazier, the better.